Concessions to Aging

As I get older, I find myself making more and more adaptations to changing physical and mental abilities. I sometimes deny that I’m making these changes because I’m getting older. I’m just developing new habits as a matter of convenience, or I’m no longer taking part in activities that I have convinced myself I no longer find interesting.

The easiest things to notice are balance changes. I know that this is a result of aging and is easier to accept because it is so common. I find myself using handrails more often and being more careful with steps. I am very particular about foot placement because I tend to drag my feet, making me more susceptible to tripping. This is a common finding among people in their 60s and older. (That’s the reason why your doctor asks you about falls.) Margie continually reminds me not to look at my phone while I’m walking.

I am also careful about how quickly I stand up. When I first get up in the morning I’ll sit on the side of the bed for a few seconds before standing and then stand for a few seconds before walking. Our body is designed so that heart rate and blood pressure change with body position to keep the brain perfused. As we get older, adaptations lag. You must give your body time to catch up to avoid the brief lightheadedness that can accompany postural change, particularly if you take blood pressure medicine. Not allowing time to adapt may cause stumbling or falling, especially during those middle-of-the-night bathroom trips.

Of course, I don’t have to tell anyone that a good night’s sleep now means I only get up twice to go to the bathroom. As long as I can go back to sleep, I’m happy.

I find that my fingers don’t always do what my brain tells them. I sometimes have trouble buttoning the cuffs on my shirt. I don’t know why that should be such a problem, but occasionally it can be difficult. Thankfully I seldom ever wear a tie anymore; collar buttons are a real challenge. Sometimes things work just fine, making it all the more frustrating when they don’t.

I find myself making lists and keeping a more detailed calendar. At first, I told myself this was just a minor concession to being busy. But I’ve always had a good memory and seldom had to write things down. Now, I know if I don’t write it down, I may not remember it. Sometimes I even forget that I’ve written it down.

I occasionally have trouble remembering things people tell me. At first, I chalked this up to hearing. However, I used to be able to recall detailed descriptions and directions almost verbatim. I now take detailed notes to ensure I keep things straight.

Memory was the first problem that concerned me. I could tell something was slipping and I wasn’t sure what to do about it. Fortunately, technology is a help. I put reminders on my phone which sounds an alert when I’m supposed to do something. Unfortunately, that doesn’t make it any less frustrating when I don’t remember having set the alert. The voice recognition app is a great way to take notes quickly and easily and they can be readilyconverted to text. An added benefit is that learning these new technologies helps keep the mind sharp.

I now recognize that the wisdom and understanding that come with many years of experience outweigh a quick memory. Sound judgement is more important than a rapid answer.

On the physical side, I gave up motorcycle riding and skiing about 12 or 15 years ago because of concerns about reaction time and balance. In large part, this was motivated by the fact that in the emergency room, I saw a disproportionate number of older men seriously injured in motorcycle accidents.

I’ve also given up using anything more than a small step ladder. The extension ladder is only a faint memory.

I’ve given up doing any type of heavy lifting such as furniture moving. Two years ago, Margie and I were helping our son move. I went to move the dryer and Margie said, “Don’t try to lift that, you’re going to give yourself a hernia.” Well, I went ahead and moved the dryer. Three weeks later I had hernia surgery. To her credit, Margie never said “I told you so”. She didn’t have to. As my friend Roy told me a while back, “The main reason old men get hurt is thinking they’re still young men.”

The bicycles pictured at the beginning of this post are yet another concession. Margie and I still enjoy riding, but stiff knees and hips make it increasingly difficult to get on and off a bicycle. Also, the normal forward-leaning riding position is hard on backs and necks. Margie’s cousin Mary recommended these bicycles. Now we can still enjoy our rides. The step-through design makes it easy to get on and off and the upright riding position makes it more comfortable. We are very happy with our “geezer cruisers”.

A couple of final comments and then I’ll wrap this up. I have started shopping for slip-on shoes with cushioned soles. As we get older, we lose much of the fat pad on the bottom of our feet, causing our older leather sole dress shoes to be less comfortable. While I am ready for slip-on shoes, I am not, I repeat not, ready for Velcro shoes. And I am certainly not ready to be called elderly. Old is a fact of life; elderly is a state of mind.